The Grand Illusion

Welcome to the Grand illusion
Come on in and see what’s happening
Pay the price, get your tickets for the show
The stage is set, the band starts playing
Suddenly your heart is pounding
Wishing secretly you were a star.

But don’t be fooled by the radio
The TV or the magazines
They show you photographs of how your life should be
But they’re just someone else’s fantasy
So if you think your life is complete confusion
Because you never win the game
Just remember that it’s a Grand illusion
And deep inside we’re all the same.
We’re all the same…

So if you think your life is complete confusion
Because your neighbors got it made
Just remember that it’s a Grand illusion
And deep inside we’re all the same.
We’re all the same…

America spells competition, join us in our blind ambition
Get yourself a brand new motor car
Someday soon we’ll stop to ponder what on Earth’s this spell we’re under
We made the grade and still we wonder who the hell we are

The Grand Illusion – Styx

I sold my sailboat yesterday, but my dream is stronger for it. The young couple that bought it quit their jobs, sold most of their worldly goods, and are completely focused on preparing the boat in a week or less so they can set sail to their future together. I found the experience totally inspiring.

I sold this boat because I lost sight of my goals, fell prey to the doubts that have plagued me most of my life. I gave up on my dream of really getting out there, crossing an ocean and finding the truth of what is inside me. Taking a risk that many would never try, breaking away from the grip of almost all things material and living a life much more in tune with nature. That boat design would never hold up to my dream so I let it go.

The lesson I think I needed to learn is never to let go of or back away from the hardships, never stop pushing for your ultimate goal. My close friend Linda died last winter never having completed her quest. She dreamed of her own little piece of land, her own home built with her own hands. She had the land and the beginnings of a home when circumstance came in and stripped her of her dream.

My heart aches to think of her dying in a hotel room with no one but her dog to comfort her in her last moments on this earth. She was only a couple years away from her goal, but that’s what life is. You ultimately have no control over what can happen to you. The healthiest people die in their 30’s from a stroke, while smokers and drinkers sometimes live to their 90’s. You have to make the most of your time on this earth, you can’t wait for the time to be perfect to follow the path your heart sets before you.

The young couple that bought my boat taught me a lesson. Put aside the notion of getting things just right, stop thinking you will know just the right time to take the plunge. Life is a gift every day you wake up, every day you get to live the life you want. They are not waiting for the perfect boat, the perfect set of circumstances in which to launch their dream. Some may call them foolhardy, but I say they are not willing to let others judge the course they wish to follow. They are willing to do what it takes to get the ball rolling to the future they want. I will do the same.

I have found many boats for sale that are sturdy enough to cross oceans. Many are in rough shape, but the design is sound. One is only a couple states away and I have half the money needed to purchase it already. This boat may not be available when I have saved the rest but their will be others. I understand now all I need is a boat of the right type, something I can move onto, then I can fix the rest of it’s problems as I go. My urge to change my lifestyle and in turn the direction of my life is so strong that I am unwilling to put this off much longer. My deadline is one year from now.

The day I move aboard I will give up my cellphone, stop spending so much time on the internet. My diet will become much more simple and healthy along with a lot more exercise. My stress level will plummet and my outlook on life will take a turn for the better. We can’t control all of what life sends us, we can only try to make the best of our circumstances. I envision my future life in tune with nature instead of fighting it, calm and quiet before the tempest that daily troubles can sometimes thrust upon you.

I ask myself again, “What are you willing to give up to get what you want?”

My answer…“Anything the interferes with my dream!”

15 thoughts on “The Grand Illusion

  1. Ever think that maybe Linda now has what she was working for? We won’t know that until it’s time for us to know. That time won’t be determined by us. Some get it here, some get it later. All who deserve it get it when it’s time. That time is when we have learned what we need to do what’s right with it.

    There’s more but I just lost it. I’ll have it again when it’s time.
    Even though most people won’t get it, don’t shut yourself off from everyone, Even the biggest dope may have something to learn from.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. The past few weeks have brought many changes. I have no doubt that you will make the best what life sends you . That has been your MO thus far. I think of Linda often. She no doubt would be supportive of each move you make toward your life goals. She lived every moment of everyday expressing gratitude for each kindness that came her way always full of hope that she could make her dream come true. In honor and remembrance of her we all strive to do the same.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m sure you were sorry to see the boat go John but you had this feeling that it wan’t quite the right thing at the right time so I’m sure it is for the best. The perfect boat will, I’m sure, be there when it is time. Meanwhile, keep healthy, and keep planning!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I agree with Peter’s comment–and sometimes its better to make adjustments in our plans. You wouldn’t want to put a lot of money, time, and work into a boat that in the end won’t suit your needs or even be safe for your planned travels. You did the wise thing and this decision will most likely get you to your goal faster than if the boat you sold didn’t work out for you. Another thing–don’t cut yourself off from the people who care about you and that you care about as well–we all need the love and support of others. You have more supporters than you think. How’s Vinny?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for those words. There was a time in my life that I would have cut myself off from all, but not now. I think I’m just in search of more space to follow my passions and find my way of life. A cell phone will be mostly useless offshore so I am looking into a satellite device that I can use anywhere for text messages. It also allows anyone to track my location on the web! As far as Vinny, he still has a great zest for life and a positive attitude we should all strive to emulate.


  5. Hi- I’m the mother of the guy who bought your boat. He dreamed since he was a young boy to be a captain and live on a boat. He loved sailing with me and is an amazing sailor from years and years of sailing and racing, starting from when he was about 4 years old. He did become a licensed captain and captained and lived on an Outer Reef 67 for the past 3 years and other boats before that. But he wanted to go back to sailing and have his own boat with his lovely girlfriend. They have many dreams of which I have no doubt that they will achieve. The boat is still in the yard but they’re working hard and the mast is up. They’re waiting to go in- hopefully in a few days- and will begin their dream. Actually, they already have. Thank you for selling them the boat and being part of their odyssey. I’m sure you will find a boat that is better suited to your needs. Fair winds and following seas.
    Patti Spaulding

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m so pleased to hear from you. It’s nice to know the boat went to the right people though I did get that feeling when we made the deal. My initial dream was crossing an ocean but I gave in to impatience when I bought this boat. Though it may be perfect for your son and his girlfriend, both of whom I found quite charming, it would not stand up to a strong offshore storm. Unlike your son my dream started much later and I have along way to go to match his sailing skills, but I have the strength of my convictions and the wisdom of age that I hope will propel me into a future filled with joy. I hope to hear from you again as your son and I both follow our dreams.


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